Madness, Redux

So, back when the whole housing crisis started to implode in late 2007, I offered some advice. With the benefit of crystal clear hindsight, we can now see my advice was not followed.

Anyhow, somebody else thinks we shouldn't have done a damn thing and the .gov should probably stop doing the myriad idiot things it's doing to "help". Obviously, this man is a genius and you you should dote on his every word. He agrees with me, and what more proof do you need of his genius? However, he has rather better academic credentials than me on the subject and argues more eloquently and with less use of profanity. You should go read the whole thing.

Tasteful Cards

Okay, maybe not so much tasteful as funny. The fine folks at Bluntcard are full of mirth and good cheer to send your fellow man. Given recent discussions about Independence Day fireworks in our subdivision, I found this one particularly appropriate. Although to the best of my limited knowledge, no houses were destroyed during the festivities.

If you prefer something a little more subtle, because this isn't, perhaps you could try the folks at Someecards. Of course, this isn't all that subtle, either. Hmm.

Does Hallmark do e-cards? Maybe you can find good taste and subtlety there.

Cash Only, Please

Banks won't be taking the IOUs California is giving out. Kinda puts a kink in the works, doesn't it? I can't say I'm sorry to see this happen.

Ding Dong

So, one each Robert S. McNamara passed away. I'm sure his family will miss him.

Me? Not so much. Burn in hell, Bobby.

Back 4 4

Well, we made it back in time for the 4th. Good thing, because I spent a shitload of money on fireworks in South Carolina. Before I go off to turn money into noise and sparkly lights, I leave you with these words from our forefathers.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. — That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, — That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security.

Thus began the grandest experiment in government in the history of mankind. I figure it's only appropriate to celebrate the anniversary of our announcement of revolt by blowing things up. So, I"m off to do so.

Too Soon?

For levity?

What, the guy dies and all of a sudden we're supposed to stop mocking him? Meh. The attention of the masses, however fickle, is part of the price you pay for fame. Don't want it? Settle down in Peoria and deliver the mail for a living.

Legends Ranch POA Board June Meeting

I’m not going to give you an exhaustive breakdown here. I’ll just throw out my primary takeaways and thoughts. First off, our Board seems like a reasonable group. They appear sincere in trying to address resident concerns. They do seem to be a get a tad exasperated because every resident has one particular hobbyhorse they want to beat to death. Or several, depending on the resident. Me, I just went to observe and see the dynamic in person.

The first big issue is the construction entrance. A whole bunch of people point out the subdivision is not really a gated secure community with that entrance still open. Also, the deed restrictions specifically prohibit any entrance that isn’t secured. Not living near it, I don’t have a dog in that hunt except as it concerns security. Everybody by the construction entrance seems to hate it, it’s a security hole, and it’s prohibited by the deed restrictions. So, the construction entrance has got to close.

The only question is how we do that and still allow for construction equipment and heavy vehicles. Neither of the existing controlled access gates is suitable for heavy truck traffic. Mesa Valley is too narrow, and we’ve already had problems with drivers of big vehicles clipping the guardhouse. The most feasible solution seems to be widening the Easy Tag lane at the front, but that costs money. Guess what? The POA is broke.

The POA is also pursuing speed bumps, even though it appears a majority of residents don’t want them. This strikes me as bizarre, but the speed bump question was essentially tabled until executive session. I didn’t get to attend that, so I guess we’ll all see what the Board comes out with when the minutes are posted. I don’t see how the Board can justify spending money on speed bumps when we’re in violation of the covenant with an unsecured gate. However, I’m not on the Board.

The POA also has budget issues. Everybody had some suggestions for how to trim money and which services are unimportant. Unfortunately for the Board, every service someone wants cut is another resident’s favorite thing evar. My suggestion? Get rid of the security patrols by the Constables. If they can’t write tickets and are only there for 4 hours from 5-9 PM, what good are they doing the community? The only time I ever see Constable patrol cars, they’re hanging out at the Splash Pad parking lot. I guess that deters crime at the Splash Pad, but I don’t see that as an issue. Maybe I need to reread the police reports for the subdivision and I'll find out the Splash Pad is a hotbed of crime.

If everybody was paying their dues, maybe the budget wouldn’t be an issue. The number being tossed around for the dues shortfall is $330K. I don’t know if that money would completely solve the budget issues, or if there’s deeper problems. However, the economy being what it is, you can’t get blood from a stone. If residents are getting foreclosed and builders are going bankrupt, I’m pretty sure the missing money to make up the budget shortfall just ain’t there. Budget cuts seem the only way to go, but I'm sure someone will bitch about those, too.

Finally, there is the traffic petition. The county now wants a majority of resident property owners to approve the petition, which is a death knell in my opinion. That means they have to get 625 property owners to agree. According to the POA manager, they can’t even get 20% of the subdivision to pick up the windshield stickers. I’m feeling doubtful they can get the numbers. Since the county doesn’t really want to do it in the first place, the Commissioners’ Court is going to use every excuse they can to not pass it.

However, at this point, I’m baffled by the point of the petition. The county has told the POA there will be no patrols even if the petition passes. What I’m taking away is we will get the level of police protection we are willing to contract. So the traffic petition is asking all of us to have the POA pay the county so the county can give us traffic tickets. Wait, what? You want me to pay to get ticketed? That’s a resounding screw you from the back row, thanks. I’ve heard dumb ideas, and that certainly qualifies.

In any event, the meeting minutes will be out sometime in the near future. Feel free to peruse them and draw your own conclusions if you weren’t there.

Non-Interference

So, Leisure Suit Larry who just stole the election in Iran is running around telling everybody who will listen the US is interfering in the electoral process over there. Ahmadinejad apparently doesn't pay attention to his surroundings. It's been a long time since we were any good at the subtle approach. We've pretty much given the whole coup d'etat deal away in favor of a straight up punitive expedition.

In other words, you dumb bastard, when the JDAMs are taking the building down around your ears, we're interfering. Until then, not so much.

Hah Hah!

Bashing British machinery never gets old. Especially since the bike has been in the shop since late May.

Self Control

I'd just like to congratulate myself for managing to make it through the POA Board Meeting without using profanity or calling any of my neighbors ignorant, stupid, or otherwise genetically predisposed towards suboptimal cognition.

Out loud, anyway. My usual approach is to sit with my lovely co-blogger and take notes on my netbook. My notes are primarily a form of entertainment for me, with actual information content being secondary. A lot of my note taking is more note passing, with me typing my snide commentary and observations to J. You're not going to see the unfiltered version, as I'm already making enough new enemies in our new neighborhood. You'd think I was a rude, abrasive, unpleasant individual. Hmm.

Anyhow, it's late and I'm going to bed. Further notes on the meeting tomorrow.

Bad Presents

I stayed home from work today due to profound gastro-intestinal distress. While I was lying in bed half-asleep, the Dog V2.0 hopped on the bed and started whining softly. I opened my eyes to see him staring at me, holding something in his mouth. I fully opened my eyes and sat up to see what the hell he had in his mouth. Dog V2.0, upon seeing he had my full attention, wagged his tail vigorously, dropped his burden, and hopped off the bed.

Leaving a dead bird on the sheets.

Thanks. Way to cap off an already shitty morning, junior.