2005/02/04

Bleagh

Over at SciFi Daily, one of the hosts is getting himself in a completely unjustifiable lather about the upcoming release of Episode III. People, I realize we all want to hold on to the dream, but let’s face facts. This movie is more than likely going to suck, and suck hard. I base this on two incontrovertible and irrefutable pieces of evidence: Episodes I and II. They pretty much blew chunks all over the screen. Why is Ep. III going to be different? Did Lucas magically make-up with his muse again after the savage beating he delivered to her in those two disasters?

I’ll be blunt: George has lost it and taken the franchise with him. I honestly don’t know if I’ll go see this in the theater. I’m not sure I’m motivated enough to get up early and hit the Sunday matinee. I’m sure as hell not paying full price, so a matinee is the only option. Maybe if George had been smart enough to hire someone as talented as Leigh Brackett to write the remaining screenplays, we wouldn’t have this problem. Too bad she died, huh? I won’t be the first nor last person to remind everyone, but the best of the Star Wars movies was neither written nor directed by Lucas. (That’s The Empire Strikes Back, for the slow.)

The franchise is dying. Let it go and wait for something new to come along. A plethora of innovative and interesting science fiction is coming out on a constant basis. Very little of it is big-budget visual extravaganzas like Ep. III. Look at it realistically, though. How much of the big budget extravaganzas are worth a crap? I would rather see a good story well told without 50 million dollars of special effects than a movie where the dominant thought I’m left with is “Nice costume and set design.” Hello, The Chronicles of Riddick. Great set design and costumes. Story? Barely coherent is being generous. Yet it got made because Pitch Black was a good film and made money. Ep. III will get made because everybody will go see it no matter how much it sucks. They’ll probably make yet another fucking Star Trek movie, and a whole bunch of lemmings will go see it. Demand accountability from your entertainment, people. If it sucks, don’t continue to patronize it. Right, Randy?

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