Chugging Bourbon Straight From The Bottle

So we've at least rid the election of the President of 9/11. That's a bonus, however you look at it. We've also disposed of Fred! and the Biggest Douche in the Universe. So we're left with a fairly dispiriting list of electable candidates.

We've got the whacked out ex-military guy with no understanding of the Constitution and anger management issues along with a tenuous grasp on reality.

We've got Mittens and his Magical Mormon Manpanties. I'd tell you what his positions are on the issues, but until the poll data comes back he won't know.

We've got Clinton II - The Sequel. Spending four years listening to that woman would drive me nuts, and all her policy positions make me want to vote with a .308.

There's the Baptist guy who thinks we need to revise the Constitution to make it more like his version of the bible.

We've also got the brother with the silver tongue. He doesn't say much about his socialism-lite, but he says it very prettily.

Finally, we've got an old Doctor who thinks a variety of things, most unpalatable to the average voter, about the scope and scale of federal government.

Yeah, I think I know what I'll be doing come election night while I wait for the bad news.

From the Duh Files: Rudy and the 2nd

Jacob Sullum dissects Rudy Giuliani's recently discovered support for the 2nd Amendment. Key quote:

his sudden interest in the Second Amendment, like his sudden interest in strict constructionism, is merely an affectation intended to allay the concerns of Republican primary voters.

You can go read the whole article, but I can sum it up for you: Rudy doesn't care about your right to keep and bear arms unless it continues to poll well. I mean, he did such a bang-up job as mayor of NYC in making sure that people who lived there could freely exercise their rights. Didn't he? Oh, wait, no, I'm hallucinating again. He didn't do a damn thing for the citizens of the city when he was mayor. So I'm sure if he gets elected to be even more important, he'll suddenly discover a reason to worry about it.

I got beachfront property in Arizona for sale if you buy that one.