Sea Kitten Up!

While I despise petards and the fuzzy-headed nonsense that passes for thinking in their daft little heads, I sometimes enjoy the glimpses into the strange landscape inside their mostly empty skulls. So I give you the sea kitten. People eat fish because they aren’t cute and cuddly, apparently. So we’ll make a marketing campaign to convince folks they really are!

The giant gaping flaw here, of course, is the actual creatures themselves. Of course, since PETA never gives a damn about the animals anyway, this makes perfect sense. Anyhow, fish are not cuddly, no matter how many cartoon whiskers you put on one. Fish also didn’t save convoys from Nazi u-boats in WW2, despite what you may have learned from watching The Incredible Mister Limpet back when you were but a wee sprog.

I guess next will be lake kittens and aquarium kittens?

Of course, like most other socialist propaganda efforts, the campaign is not aimed at you. It’s aimed at the children to encourage them to think correctly. It’s too late for the big people like you. You’ll just have to go up against the wall when the Revolution comes.

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