Dogmatic Slumber

Well, it's been a while since we decided to entertain, inform, and enrage the masses via the tiny soapbox here at YPS. We have been busy. We've been paying lawyers, acquiring children, and once again attempting to find the perfect location for our palatial estate. Real life has interrupted the free content generator, as it so often does.

In any event, the current kerfuffle over what, exactly, the NSA has been doing to everyone with a Verizon account has roused us from our nap. As the scandal widens, and more and more internet traffic appears to run through the servers at the Puzzle Palace, the response has been instructive.

A common thread by serious, no doubt well-intentioned, people has been the old saw about "If you've done nothing wrong, you have nothing to fear." This response, in part because it's so common and so misguided, deserves a little more in-depth discussion than my immediate knee-jerk bitter laugh.

A nice man named Harvey Silverglate wrote a book titled Three Felonies A Day. While I encourage you to read it, the basic thrust is simple. The federal criminal code, and the accompanying federal regulations, has become so overbroad, intrusive, and pervasive that you (and everyone else in America) are in violation multiple times a day. My favorite common example is to ask you to go read the labels on a bottle of Pine-Sol or Lysol and find the simple phrase "It is a violation of federal law to use this product in a manner inconsistent with its labeling." So, if you don't read the label on bottle of Lysol and comply with all of the instructions, you have committed a federal crime. Will you be prosecuted? Probably not, as long as you fly under the radar of the feds.

However, once you have come to the notice of one cog of the machine, you run the risk of being ground up by the various pieces working together. You cannot afford to deal with the multitude of federal agencies, each showing up to enforce their little bit of complex and arcane federal law. They will find something, and you will be subject to civil and/or criminal penalties. This has happened to a number of people, and there is very little that can be done about it. All it takes is a 30 second phone call or chance meeting between personnel from different agencies with the comment "Maybe you should look at this guy..." and another agency can pile on.

So when some well-meaning naïf spouts the idea that people who have done nothing wrong have nothing to fear, there's a glaring fundamental error: we've all of us, everyone, done something. Is it worth the feds time to try to harass you about? If you're Joe Average who only sends his mom baby pictures and lolcats, it probably won't happen. But what about engaging in political advocacy? Maybe you decide to form a 501 organization to oppose some governmental action? Why, it may just be time to take a look at your compliance record with all these laws and rules. If it does become expedient to target you, do you honestly think the NSA data won't find its way into the right hands in a high profile case? You have done something illegal and selective prosecution is now the name of the game.

I leave you with the cautionary tale of Joseph Nacchio. Joseph Nacchio used to be the head of telecommunications firm Qwest Communications. He consulted with his legal department and decided he needed a court order to hand over records to the feds, and at the time was the only CEO of a telecom firm to take this stance. Joseph Nacchio was subsequently convicted of insider trading and sent to jail for 6 years and was fined 19 million dollars. If you honestly think there's no connection whatsoever between these events, then there's really nothing more to say.

Except maybe this.

Chicken Sandwiches Aren't Important

Let's leave aside the very real issue of elected government officials threatening legitimate businesses over the views of the executives, okay? J already covered that. It's a real issue, and one that more people should have focused on.

But this has been going on for over a week and the circus has reached the point of absurdity. I'd like to congratulate everyone for taking the bait and going off on a tangent in the middle of disaster. We're borrowing $41,000 a second to spend on useless bullshit, and people are spending all their time worrying about a chicken sandwich chain? 

What's gonna impact your human rights more, GLBT community? The fact that some guy who sells sandwiches doesn't think you should get married or the inescapable debt peonage you'll be placed into by the federal government to pay off the $15,900,000,000,000 they owe to everybody under the sun? Think about the answer long and hard, because so far you've come to the entirely wrong conclusion. Of course, the frenzied adulation showered upon a president who has done exactly 'jack' and 'shit' for your issues shows the clarity of y'all's thinking.

Now, don't think the other side is blameless either. Great, go buy a chicken sandwich and support free speech or whatever. But it's still not a big deal. Even the halfwitted mumbler and the overcompensating ballerina had to come up and admit there really wasn't anything they could do. By driving the conversation to even more ridiculous heights, you sucked out all the oxygen in the room and diverted everybody's attention from more important issues.

Grow the fuck up, people. You're concerning yourself with trivia while the world burns. Our national spending is completely out of control, and distracting yourself with sandwich drama isn't helping.

While I'm on the subject of adult behavior, try to remember one thing if you're going to go play kissy-face in front of or inside of a restaurant tonight: a fundamental aspect of character is how you treat people who have no power over you. If you think, as this guy apparently did, that by harassing the employees of a restaurant your making some kind of grand statement, you're half-right. You're making the less-than-grand statement that you're an asshole who thinks mistreating innocent people is just peachy. Get your protest on, but don't be a dick to the people working there. They need their paycheck just as much as any of you do.    

Why We're Screwed

J likes to have the TV on in the morning for background noise and a little information. She keeps it tuned to Fox News, because after all, she is a republican. One story they've run a few times is the sad tale of a little company in Kentucky who makes jackets for Air Force One. The Federal Bureau of Prisons was going to compete for the work, and the loss of the contract would put the poor firm out of business. However, the brave business owner complained to the media and his Congressional delegation, and lo! The Federal Bureau of Prisons decided to withdraw from the bid, and the company is saved!

There are so many things wrong with this story it's hard to know where to start. Let's go with an immediate Business 101 level observation: if you are dependent on one customer for your continued existence, you have a problem. Diversify. Find other markets for your product. Find other business avenues to explore. Do something, anything, so if the big customer quits buying from you, you can survive. Frankly, piss-poor business practices alone should ensure Ashland Sales & Service goes bankrupt.

Moving right along, let's discuss the contracting issue. You have no right to have the taxpayer buy your product, okay? If, as it appears was the case, the Federal Bureau of Prisons can provide the item at a lower cost, guess what? I want the Federal Bureau of Prison to provide it. The federal government is not a jobs program. The fed should be trying to be wise stewards of the taxpayers' dime, which means going with lowest-cost bidding. If you ain't the lowest cost, screw you. Compete. Lower your costs. Improve your productivity. Don't whine about how the mean Federal Bureau of Prisons has lower labor costs and it's impossible to do anything. In other words, do your job and don't run to the government to get protection. This is the epitome of special interest: AS&S wants the government to screw over the taxpayer so they can benefit from the decision.

Next up, why in the hell are we buying special jackets for Air Force One, anyway? Unless things have changed, the zoomies get uniforms just like us groundlings did. All the personnel on Air Force have jackets, thoughtfully provided at taxpayer expense. What, they need another just because they fly on the same plane as their boss? Last time I checked, we don't have a palace guard in this country. The President is not the God-Emperor of America, and those blessed with his presence shouldn't get special uniforms. And the man himself? The President does not need a nice pretty flight jacket, and even if he wants one, he makes 400 large a year and should be able to afford one all by his own self.

Strangely, none of this was discussed in the coverage I've seen. These are basic considerations that maybe, just maybe, we should be considering when we decide to spend the government's our money. Instead, everybody's tear-jerking about how the business will go under and people will be unemployed and boo-fucking-hoo. Quit trying to tug on my heartstrings and think for a minute. We are $15 trillion and change in debt, and we have to be a jobs program for jacket manufacturers. We can't get anyone to ask "Why are we buying these jackets? And if we have to buy them, why can't we get them cheaper?" Nobody in the government is empowered to ask these questions but our elected officials, and they don't have the fortitude and willpower to do what's necessary.

And that, boys and girls, is why we're screwed: We have given ourselves the government we deserve.

Zombocalypse

So, in regards to the zombie apocalypse advice I passed along earlier, I would like to note that May is apparently Zombie Awareness Month. I only ask that you don't put a ribbon on your car for the occasion, since ribbon proliferation has run amuck and should be stopped. I hesitate to say force is necessary to stop the scourge of cause ribbons, but it may yet come to that.

Anyhow, Tam is back on Zombie Apocalypse this morning, and the good folks at Zombie Squad never leave the subject.

H/t to one of the others for the notification of Zombie Awareness Month.

Preparedness

Tam sums it up nicely:

If you are prepared for the dead to walk the earth in search of human brains, then a hurricane or attempted mugging is no big deal.

I'm more prepared for a hurricane than the living dead, but I should be okay for a while in either event.

And while you're preparing, here's a handy tip. We used dimes in the Army. Somebody says quarters are harder. Now I'm wondering what the physics implies.

Why Congress Is Stupid

Actually, Congress is an emergent system which, by definition, can’t be stupid as it has no consciousness. However, as our fearless congresscritters and other functionaries in and around DC try to manage the business of a vast, unimaginably complex collection of disparate individuals, it’s important to consider the limits of their knowledge. Congress may not be stupid, but Congress does make bad decisions.

One of the reasons why was explained 65 years ago by a guy named Freidrich Hayek. The short version (long version here) is coordination of any complex system requires too much information for any one individual to collect and process in time to make rational decisions which will affect the system. Computers, strangely, made this problem worse because the guy trying make decisions is going to be overpowered by the multitude of computers everywhere else. He can't possibly keep up with the data. It's a simple truth, but one that everybody ignores.

As recent events have proven, Congress can't even keep track of their own information, much less any other information. Congress just passed a 2,300 page bill none of the members had read in its entirety. What effect the bill will have on the 266 volumes of federal law and regulation, nobody yet knows. So, once again, I have to ask: in what universe was passing this bill a good idea?

Late Warning

In my continuing effort to bring you news you can use, I would like to let you know the Rapture is imminent. I realize this warning comes a little bit late, but what can I say? I am not the first in line for news of this nature.

Anyhow, you've been warned. Evade Behave appropriately.

Go To Jail

You are a criminal. Well, you're probably a criminal. Here's why.

Somehow, this strikes me as a less than optimal state of affairs.

Many Call It Conspiracy

The CFR comes and goes as a conspiratorial organization. Yesterday, Timmy the Tax Cheat was speaking to them and apparently endorsed a one world currency approach. Oh noes! The Obamanauts will sell us out to the UN! Novus Ordo Seclorum! FEMA Takeover! Internment Camps! National Sovereignty loss in 3... 2... 1...

Well, maybe not so much. Here's the transcript. As an aside, it's hard to be conspiratorial when you're posting transcripts on the web. As I read this, somebody is asking a question about the Chinese central bank's proposal for... something. I lack the background to know exactly WTF is being discussed. Geithner, not wanting to piss off the guy who's holding the largest amount of US debt, says there may be something useful in the proposal, but I haven't read it. Strangely, this statement triggered the buttons of the paranoids. Nobody seems to give a damn about his multiple statements that the government is going to do whatever it takes for however long it takes to get us out of this crisis. Which one worries you more? The thought that the Chinese may have some thoughts on the current crisis which may contain some utility, or the thought that the government is going to fix this crisis by any means necessary?

I know which one disturbs me more, and the Chinese are by far not my biggest concern.

For another take on the effectiveness of the bailout, try here.

Doom!

For your entertainment, a history of the prophesied end of civilization. We're all still here, so obviously they've been wrong up until now.

I Think My Brain Just Broke

So, the n00b is gonna cut the deficit in half by the end of his first term. I just want to point out two things in the article.

Calling for fiscal restraint

his $787 billion economic stimulus package

So, can anyone tell me how that works? The same guy that just signed a spending bill for all the moneys now says we have to exercise fiscal restraint? Is this another one of these "do as i say, not as I do" deals? Because from where I'm sitting, it sure looks that way.

What really infuriates me more than anything else is that we have taken the problem and pushed it off on the younger generation yet again. God forbid somebody tell the boomers and the rest of us adults the cold, ugly truth. The money for all the stuff we got promised just ain't fucking there. So you know what that means? We don't get the stuff. Big Daddy Gubmint got a pay cut down at the mill and there's no more money to keep handing out candy to the kids, so shut up and eat your vegetables.

But we, collectively, just won't let that happen. Apparently, we think it isn't fair that somebody's not going to get something they were promised by an organization going bankrupt! You know what? It's also not fair to screw some kid that just turned 18, or 12, or was just born, into paying for stuff for somebody else. But that's exactly what we're doing. All you people with young kids should be screaming bloody murder, because Congress and the President just raped their future while you stood around with your thumb up your ass. Unless, of course, you voted for the donks in the last election cycle. Then you actively contributed to the destruction of your children's future. Well done, you.

Cassandra Politics

So, one of the fun benefits of being a libertarian is the almost universal dislike in which the majority of the political classes hold your ideas. Right now, a whole bunch of us are looking at the stimulus and saying "This won't do what you want, and has a whole host of bad effects you don't want." Is anyone paying attention? Not so much. The ignuts are fixing to screw us all, and when it all fails spectacularly, some of us can say "Told ya! Sure did." Whee! It's a very small consolation prize in lieu of a limited government and an unfucked economy.

What's even more dispiriting is the current rush to worship at the altar of government intervention. Oh, noes! Something bad happened! The gummint must fix it! Never mind that in many people's opinions (mine included) the ham-handed attempts to micromanage bits of the economy caused the problem in the first place. So, a crisis caused in large part by government intervention will be solved by government intervention? Hmm. New crisis in 3... 2... 1...

Finally, I'll also point out the two most important words in Latin: caveat emptor. A whole bunch of people bought a whole bunch of weird derivatives and mortgage backed securities without understanding what they were buying or how the whole thing worked. Quite bluntly, I should not (nor should the rest of you taxpayers) subsidize someone's incompetence. If you bought a bunch of dodgy financial instruments and are now going bankrupt, so sorry, sucks to be you, make better choices next time. Similarly, if you signed up for a mortgage you didn't understand and can't afford, so sorry, sucks to be you, rent an apartment and move on with your life. Learn from the experience and grow into a financially responsible young butterfly, caterpillar.

Anyhow, mark me down for one "not gonna work" prediction entree with a side dish of "horrible unintended consequences". If my orders fail to materialize, I'll roast up the crow and get to eatin'. But I'm confident my dishes will arrive.

SBT

So, have they passed the stimulus and doomed us all yet? DOOM! DOOM, I say! Anyway, I haven't been paying attention. I figure it's a done deal, my people won't vote for it, and things will continue much as they have with an extra helping of screw the taxpayer. There's not much I can do either way, so I'm moving on. DOOM! Excuse me. Okay, now I'm moving on.

So, a little light essential reading for y'all here. Apparently, not enough people have read it, or anything like it, so I'm bringing it up again. Maybe it'll stick to a few brains.

In other news, the chandelier for the dining room arrived earlier this week.

Let me pause to insert a minor rant about how I spent a ton of money on a brand new house and can't even get light fixtures that are remotely pleasing or paint colors I want. Because the logistics of maybe having more paint colors than beige, beige, off-white, beige, off-white, and beige are just completely insurmountable, right? As is the possibility of having light fixtures in a finish other than shit brown distressed bronze or cheap bling gold. The customer is always right, within a very small subset of possible values for "right". Note that right also does not overlap with attractive for any of the available subsets.

Of course, the instructions for the chandelier were two quarto pages of small diagrams. Not real helpful, and they actually got lost in the packaging for two days. I went to the hardware store and bought a whole bunch of lamp parts. Apparently, cheap chandeliers from China use a thread that is slightly off from anything used in lamps here in America. Who knew? Eventually, I gave up and creatively reconfigured the hardware in the box to make it work. Instructions might have helped here, but it just wasn't to be. Fortunately, I'm fecking brilliant and can manage without them. We should be hanging the chandy sometime this evening if all goes well. If I've done my job, it should light up and not fall down. J is responsible for final aesthetic arrangement and judgment.

I'll also note that Valentine's Day is tomorrow. Why the death or burial (reports differ) of a matryred priest and giving your person gifts came to be connected, I'll never know with any certainty. Regardless, party it up with your peeps and spread the love, unless medically contraindicated. Nobody wants oozing sores as a present, kids.

FTG

At some point, I really have to answer a fundamental question. At what point is obedience no longer owed to a government gone so far beyond the bounds granted it by citizens it is essentially unrepresentative and uncontrollable? I find myself pondering the question more and more lately.

Judging from the polling data I've seen, a minority of the country is in favor of the economic stimulies plan. Yet it got passed, at a cost that will result in young N paying more taxes for the rest of her life. Similarly, the original TARP bill was passed over the objections of a majority of the public.

I also read the 2^nd Circuit Court of Appeals has decided the 2^nd Amendment is not incorporated as a check on the states or localities. Strange, isn't it?. The Bill of Rights only selectively applies to local governments. Some parts of our inalienable rights really aren't, depending on judicial whim.

Speaking of judicial whim, the government's assertion of “state secrets” is based on a case where there was no compelling national security interest. The government lied to cover up incompetence and malfeasance. More recently, we're watching the government continue to assert “state secrets” to avoid exposing the ugliness of torturing people for no particularly good reason. Whee!

I'm having a hard time justifying to myself why I should continue to abide by my understanding of the social contract when the rest of society seems to feel the contract can be rewritten at will. I didn't sign up for Leviathan, so why should I continue to prop it up?

Stimulant Abuse Is Bad

So, have I mentioned lately how hare-brained the stimulus is? No? Let's sum it up in one sentence.

Spending money we don't have on things that won't work is a monumentally stupid idea.

There, that was easy. A nicer version of the same concept can be found here. I realize my opinion is less than persuasive, but I would hope a couple hundred economists including three Nobel laureates might be more credible.

Then again, another Nobel prize-winning economist says if you oppose the stimulus, you're a dishonest hack. Hmm. Who to believe? The guy who spent the past eight years losing his mind spectacularly and publicly and was proven wrong repeatedly on several important issues? Or 200 or so of his peers who think the stimulus is bullshit?

In any event, it looks more and more certain the stimulus is going to happen because... because... hell, I don't have clue why it's gonna happen at this point. The venality and incompetence of our political class comes to mind for some reason, but there may be more to it than that. Gross stupidity may play a role, as well.

Credit Crunch?

So I keep hearing that credit markets are tightening up, and that loans are more difficult to come by. I personally don't know, as I'm not in the market for a loan and have a sneaking suspicion I can get one anyway. Maybe this applies to business credit, real estate, and car loans. I honestly don't know. Half of the financial press these days seems to be filled with speculation about what might happen instead of hard data about what is happening.

However, I find it difficult to believe it's hard to get credit when the grocery store has taken to printing credit card applications on the bottom of the receipts.