Alien Creatures

I frequently attempt to understand the thought processes of people not like me. It’s an exercise which usually ends with me wandering off thinking to myself about just how nuts people are. Usually, I just wander down the hall and talk to the sales department. Today, I read an article by someone who claims he’s not a dickhead vegetarian. I have my doubts, having never encountered such a specimen in the wild. I usually encounter the types that feel compelled to look at whatever piece of flesh I’m eating and tell me “That’s bad for you.” Yeah, so’s fucking hassling me about my lunch. Keep it up and find out why. I tend to get a tad hostile towards people who try to extol the virtues of vegetarianism to me. I chalk it up as a remnant of having to deal with my semi-psychotic, wanna-be hippie mother on the subject as a child. Either that or the fact that I’m just generally hostile, take your pick.

Anyhow, he makes the valid point that most restaurants spend no time and effort on their vegetarian dishes. And why would they, especially around here? The economic return doesn’t justify it. Trying to make this point, he framed the question thusly:

With no flesh available, picture what you'd make

My immediate thought was “a trip to the store for some meat”. I’m probably not the target audience he’s trying to reach.